Things I'm Grateful For

It’s been a long time since I’ve posted anything. Sorry. I blame life’s propensity for speeding up and then before you know it, the year is ending again.

So in the spirit of the season, and to prevent my inner Grinch from taking over, I’ve decided to make a list of things I am grateful for.

Aaaaand we’re off!

I’m grateful…

…to Heavenly Father and Jesus for all of my blessings.
…for my family and friends.
…for my church and my faith.
…for Riley, Karlie, and Sadie G.
…that Sadie G’s kidney problem is resolving itself.
…that I have a job – even though sometimes I don’t like it.
…for all of the opportunities I’ve had.
…for second, third, fourth, and fifth chances.
…that I was able to move out of my parents’ house this year.
…for friends that indulge me in my strange whims, ideas, grandiose plans, and overall weirdness.
…that I’m one year closer to paying off my car.
…that I’m getting closer to completing my B.A.
…for freedom and those who fight to preserve it.
…for chocolate, cookies, pastries, and candy.
…for gym memberships.
…that vinyl records are coming back.
…for puppies, kittens, and little baby bunnies.
…for Beatles Rock Band.
…for my hairstylist who is also my friend.
…for long hot showers on cold mornings.
…that I can go into five different grocery stores and have thousands of choices of what to eat.
…for loud rock concerts that leave my ears ringing for days.
…for pretty dresses, sexy high heels, jewelry, and purses.
…for all of the bands I like to listen to.
…for books, iPods, and Blackberries.
...for DVR, Wikipedia, and footrests.
…for heating and air conditioning.
…for Christmas trees, lights, and presents.
…for fireworks, swimming pools, and barbecues.
…for candles, ceiling fans, and flowers.

I’m grateful for so many things; these are just some of them. I hope you all take time to remember what you have instead of focusing on what you don’t have.

Have a merry Christmas, a Happy Hanukkah, a Kwazy Kwanzaa, a Tip-Top Tet, and a solemn and eventful Ramadan!

God bless and 84,000 blessings to y’all.

Boo-yah.

Siblings

Having siblings is great – for the most part. I can’t imagine not having my older brother or my younger sister around.

When you have brothers and sisters, it takes the brunt off of you and anything bad you might do. If you happen to fail a test on the same day that a sibling punches a hole through the wall, your failure will be most likely blown off, if not completely unnoticed.

But when you have siblings, anything good you do also risks going unnoticed. Milestones can potentially go ignored, especially when your siblings have already achieved them. Things like graduations, weddings, and children aren’t quite as interesting when they’ve already been done by your brothers and sisters and you’re the only one left who hasn’t done any of those.

Weddings, graduations, and new babies are great. The first time any of those happen in the family is so exciting. The second time is exciting but the newness is worn off. It’s not clichéd but it’s not unique either. After enough of those milestones have been reached by your siblings, when the last one’s turn comes along, it’s like “Okay great you did this but who cares because it’s already been done," or "Oh, look what you finally got around to doing."

My brother has gotten married, graduated from college, and had two children. My sister has gotten married, graduated from college, and is expecting her first child.

I have not gotten married, I have not graduated from college, and I am not expecting any children; however, I HAVE managed to flunk out of college, total a car, go to four different colleges without getting a single degree, and be the only one of my parents’ children to still be living at home at 27. Yay me.

My brother and sister have done these amazing and wonderful things and I am so happy for them, truly.

But I don’t have much to look forward to when and if my turn comes, do I.

I had to post this

I took this picture a while ago and had to post it. It makes me laugh...

This is one of my cats, Holstein, in the Melodye version of the "redneck cat carrier." He didn't like it too much, but I laughed my ass off.

Oh the times, they are a-changin

I have decided to revamp my blog just a little.

I hear those gasps and cries of outrage but be of good cheer, oh faithful readers of mine (and I do love you so.)

The inanity, hilarity, and zany-ness will continue. Come on. Did you really think that would change? I can’t even write an entry about changing the blog without it getting out of hand. See?

I have decided to try my hand at amateur music promotion, in addition to my “usual” posts. I have done many music-themed entries, so there is no need to reiterate to you of my deep love for music. But instead of just raving about established bands and musicians that certainly don’t need any promotion from me, I will dedicate myself to sharing my love of various local and indie bands.

And by local, I mean Las Vegas, because that’s where I’m based. I’m a poor college student – I can’t afford to be traipsing everywhere. Yet. Someday, when I take over the world, though, that will change. (Do you see what I mean about the inanity not going anywhere??) Luckily, Las Vegas has a thriving music community.

Don’t worry; I am not suffering delusions of grandeur. But I love going to see local bands play AND if I’m going to procrastinate doing my homework, why not write about something I love? It works on so many levels.

I even already have a candidate in mind for the first official band promotion entry – entry coming very, very soon.

If your brother’s roommate’s cousin’s friend is in a band or if you have a band you really dig and want to share with the rest of us, let me know. I’d love to have a listen and see how they sound.

I'm going to add this: If you live somewhere other than Las Vegas and know of a band that you love, and their music is somewhere that I can listen to online (i.e. Myspace, Facebook) or otherwise available (indie music stores, band websites whatever), I'll give them a write-up too. What the heck, right?

We’ll see how long this lasts. I may get bored. I may not have enough time. But I think it’ll be fun, so hopefully I can roll with it.

This week's current favorites and why

Yes, yes: we all know that I love music so don’t be so shocked that this is yet another music-centric post.

I am under no delusions that I am educating any of you about music. You may even think that I have horrible taste in music. You’re welcome to think that. Truly, you are. (Judge not, lest ye be judged.)

But be forewarned that if you ever ride in my car, step foot in my house or office, or borrow one of my iPods (HAH!) these songs are prominently on there, as well as all of the other songs I’ve made reference to in this here blog o’mine.

Here is another list of songs that I’m currently enjoying. I find the time between release dates interesting: there is 17 years between the first released song on my list and the one on the album released just last week (March 31, 2009 – for posterity.)

I’ve also included album titles and release dates, in case you ever want to go on Jeopardy or something. (Nerd.)

1. “Yellow Ledbetter” – Pearl Jam (“Jeremy” Single B-side, 1992; included on Lost Dogs, 2003)

This song just speaks to me. It makes me think of things I didn’t know I could think of. “Yellow Ledbetter” is fast becoming one of the songs that I would have to have with me if I were stranded on a desert island.

2. “Unintended” – Muse (Showbiz, 1999)

The guitar intro, the haunting melody(e) (hehe), and His Hotness’ heartfelt words make a beautiful song about taking a second chance at love. The first time I heard this, I got a little teary. I’m not even joking.

I heart this song.

3. “Stolen” – Dashboard Confessional (Dusk and Summer, 2006)

Yes, I know. Dashboard Confessional is emo. (Get the holy water!) It’s still a good song.
Bite me.

4. “Today” – Smashing Pumpkins (Siamese Dream, 1993)

Ahhh, Smashing Pumpkins. One of the significant bands of the 1990s. This takes me back to flannel shirts, black t-shirts, and ripped jeans. Who am I kidding? These are still mainstays of my wardrobe. (Grunge will come back, dang it!)

Even though this song is about Billy Corgan’s depression, self-mutilation, and suicide attempts, this is still an enjoyable song. It’s funny that this is being used in a fairly upbeat commercial proving once again: “they” just don’t get us, man.

5. “Like a Stone” – Audioslave (Audioslave, 2002)

This is a song about waiting. Which I seem to do a lot of. But I still like it. Chris Cornell has a nice voice and Tom Morello rocks, period.

6. “My Never” – Blue October (Approaching Normal, 2009)

One of the seven original plots of the world that plays out like this:

Person A wants Person B.
Person B doesn’t want Person A.
Person A mopes and pines for Person B.
Person B doesn’t care.

We’ve all been there. But this song is touching. I heart this song as well.

7. “Kristy, Are You Doing Okay?” – The Offspring (Rise and Fall, Rage and Grace, 2008)

Who knew that those responsible for “Pretty Fly for a White Guy” and some of their other more…interesting…songs could do this?

I could have used this song during high school.

8. “So Close, So Far” – Hoobastank (For(n)ever, 2009)

At first, I thought the song sounded kind of stalker-ish, but Doug Robb (the singer) says the song is about the people across the world fighting to keep the peace. Whatever it’s about, I can dig it.

9. “Eternally Missed” – Muse (“Hysteria” Single B-side, 2003)

In my opinion, this B-side really should have made it onto Absolution, Muse’s 2003 album; however, I don’t work for a record label. That probably says something right there.

Whatever. I love it. So :P on you.

10. “Safe” – Travis (The Invisible Band, 2001)

Anything I say about Travis would be paltry and inadequate because this band is just PHENOMENAL.

11. “Angels on the Moon” – Thriving Ivory (Thriving Ivory, 2008)

I love the lyrics in this song. This one gets the A+ for lyrics.

** I figured out who the lead singer reminds me of: a cross between a young Axel Rose and Gavin DeGraw. COOL!

12. “Killing in the Name” – Rage Against the Machine (Rage Against the Machine, 1992)

I don’t know if my list has a theme or what, but whatever the theme is, this song surely deviates from it. But it’s RATM! Come ON! They rock!

I wasn't going to mention the uh, language because again, come on, it's Rage Against the Machine! But for you people who have been living under a ROCK and never heard of RATM, well, they say naughty words. A lot.

13. “Fake It” – Seether (Finding Beauty in Negative Spaces, 2007)

LOVE THIS. Beware of language though. You may not want to play this around kids or uber-religious types. (I’m just sayin’.)

Fun fact: This band is from South Africa.

14. “Little Pieces” – Gomez (A New Tide, 2009)

This album is literally brand new, released March 31, 2009. I don’t know if this is going to be released as a single or not, but this song is fantastic.

15. “Black Metallic” – Catherine Wheel (Ferment, 1992)

I seem to have saved the best for last. Rock on!

As Ned Flanders would say, this song ro-diddly-ocks. A common misconception is that this is about a woman: not so, fair reader, for this song is about a car.

Fun fact: front man Rob Dickinson is cousin to Bruce Dickinson. Yes, THAT Bruce Dickinson of Iron Maiden. (Another rockin’ band!)

Honorable Mention: “The Killing Angel” – Demophon (unreleased)

I’m including this song on my list as an honorable mention because I love it. The only reason it didn’t make the 15: I don’t have it on my iPod because it is still unreleased and therefore limited to the myspace website. (check it out at: www.myspace.com/demophonmusic)

All right then!

After reviewing my list, I’ve noticed that a good portion of the bands are from England & Scotland. I don’t know what they put in the water over there, but so many AWESOME bands are British. Maybe I should move to England…

My thoughtful spot

I am a sports car type of girl. I loved my Mustang and, almost a year after trading it in, am still in active mourning for it. I love my Jetta, too, but it’s not a sports car so it’s a different kind of love. I have never wanted a truck or even an SUV. I’m just not that kind of girl.

But for the first time in my life, today I wished I had a truck.

Why the sudden change of heart, you might ask.

I was feeling very pensive and a little blue this evening and needed to go sort some things out in my head. Possibly have a good cry, even. I needed to just sit and think without any distractions – other than Muse, of course.

One cool thing I discovered very early on in Las Vegas is the airport. (Yes, I know. Of all the things in Vegas, I write about the airport.) The neat thing about McCarran International is that on one of the streets running next to the runways, there is a little parking lot where you can pull off and watch the planes take off and land.

I have always loved planes – military, commercial, private, you name it; I love it as long as it’s an airplane. Maybe it has something to do with my dad being in the Air Force; I don’t know. But I love planes.

So I go to that little parking lot to watch the airplanes when I’m feeling sad, pensive, or lonely. It’s therapeutic, really, and after an hour or so of my “therapy,” I’m usually okay.

But today, my thoughtful spot was no good.

There is a ton of construction going down at McCarran and a lot of it is going on at the runways. From my thoughtful spot, all I could see were parked tanker trucks, piles and piles of rubble and building materials, and cranes. Of the few planes landing at that time, the only parts of the planes I could see were the tails. That’s not the tail I want to see. (hah!)

After a few minutes of that, I decided to try my backup thoughtful spot in Anthem. After driving all the way to Anthem from the airport, I was dismayed to discover that my backup has been paved over and made into houses.

What does this have to do with the sudden urge for a truck? I wanted to go into the desert and do some rough driving. I wanted to do what I still call “off-roading”, but what other people call “four-wheeling” or “muddin’.” I wanted to find a new thoughtful spot, or at least a temporary one to stand in until the construction at the airport is done.

Alas, I do not have a truck, but my lovely Jetta and I was not about to take that into the desert. So I have not had a chance to be all pensive and do my thinking, and more than likely, have a good cleansing cry. Gas is still too expensive to just drive aimlessly, and with a potential crying jag on the horizon, I didn't want to be driving and crying at the same time.

Does anyone have a thoughtful spot that they wouldn’t mind sharing until mine’s back? :(

Wanted: One thoughtful spot. Must be Jetta-friendly. Apply within.

Cold Turkey

RULES

1. Put your iTunes, Windows Media Player, etc. on shuffle.

2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.

3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS.

4. Have Fun!

and here we go.....!

IF SOMEONE SAYS 'ARE YOU OKAY' YOU SAY?

“The Metal” (Tenacious D)

Um. Okay. I’m totally going to say that from now on.
“Are you okay, Melodye?” they’ll say.
“The Meeeeehtal, man,” I’ll reply.

HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE YOURSELF?

“Underneath the Sky” (Oasis)

This can totally work with the above answer.

Observe:
“Are you okay, Melodye?”
“I’m Underneath the Sky so I’m pretty The Metal today.”
See? It’s perfect.

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?

“Yeah!” (Usher)

I guess I’m tryin’ to get a little V-I cause on a one-to-ten he's a certified twenty…

HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?

“Mr. Blue” (Garth Brooks)

Very fitting. It would be even more fitting if it was “Ms. Blue” as I am, after all, a female.

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?

“I’m All Alone” (Spamalot)

Gah! I hope not!

WHAT'S YOUR MOTTO?

“Surfin’ Safari” (Beach Boys)

I can’t swim, but okay. Surf’s up dude!

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?

“Why Should I Be Sad” (Britney Spears)

I hope this doesn’t mean that my friends don’t think I have anything to be sad about.

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?

“Dinner is Served” (Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest)

A hahahahahaha! Oh that is just PERFECT! LOL, it works on soooo many levels!

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?

“Like a Stone” (Audioslave)

Collecting rocks? Stoning someone? Getting stoned?

WHAT IS 2 + 2?

“Know Your Rights” (The Clash)

There is no LAW that 2 + 2 always has to equal 4, dang it! I know my rights! Good DAY sir!

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?

“Mickey” (Toni Basil)

I have no idea how this fits my best friends. I don’t get it. None of them are overly made-up 80s cheerleaders.

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?

“A Hard Rain’s A-Gonna Fall” (Bob Dylan)

I don’t have the hardest life, but some parts have not exactly been the easiest. I have been known to slur my words in a Dylan-esque fashion, too, so I’ll give this the old two thumbs up.

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?

“Why Don’t We Do It In the Road” (The Beatles)

Does this mean I want to be an exhibitionist??? … Okay, I can dig it.

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?

“Dancing Queen” (Abba)

I don’t even have anything snappy to say to this. It’s too funny.

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?

"Unintended" (Muse)

How awesome! I LOVE that song!!

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?

“I Like That” (Houston)

Does that mean that people will like that I’m dead? Or does that mean that I’ll like that I’m dead? Or will it just be played to get a rockin’ dance party going? Because I’ll come back for that.

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?

“Do You Sleep” (Lisa Loeb)

I'm clapping right now. iTunes has hit it right on the head with this one: I do like a nice long nap.

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST FEAR?

“Wrack My Brain” (Ringo Starr)

This is true: I’m deathly afraid of terrible disco songs by former Beatles. Get it away, get it away!
(Sorry Ringo. You’re still my favorite Beatle. But this song is truly, madly, deeply terrible.)

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?

“Flaws and All” (Beyonce)

This one I have no arguments with. I AM a TOTAL biz in the morning. And during the day. And at night.

WHAT DO YOU WANT RIGHT NOW?

“Who Feels Love” (Oasis)

Who couldn’t use some lovin’??

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?

“Enter the Circus” (Christina Aguilera)

It’s like iTunes…KNOWS me or something.

WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?

“Cold Turkey” (John Lennon)

Rock on, brotha man.

(Once again, I take the easy way out and avoid doing a real blog.)

Things I have done during my lifetime

This is an incomplete list, as I fully expect to accomplish more of these in my lifetime.

Things you have done during your lifetime (plus comments, as necessary):

(X) Gone on a blind date
(X) Donated Blood
(X) Skipped school
( ) Watched someone die
(X) Been to Canada
(X) Been to Mexico
(X) Been to Florida
( ) Been to Hawaii
( ) Ran out of gas while driving
(X) Been on a plane
(X) Broken the law
( ) Been on a helicopter
(X) Been lost
(X) Gone to Washington, DC
( ) Hugged a homeless person
(X) Swam in the ocean
( ) Swam with Stingrays

(I don't know that I want to, after what happened to the Crocodile Hunter...)

( ) Been sailing in the ocean
(X) Cried yourself to sleep
(X) Lived in more than one state
(X) Played cops and robbers
(X) Done a back flip on a trampoline
( ) Recently colored with crayons
(X) Gone on a diet
( ) Ran a marathon
(X) Made a life-long friend

(I hope that I have. I haven't exactly finished living my life yet, so I don't know who is lifelong and who isn't...)

(X) Sang Karaoke
( ) Volunteered at a soup kitchen
( ) Been ice fishing
( ) Paid for a meal with coins only
( ) Been to the top of the St. Louis Arch
( ) Seen the Northern Lights
( ) Been Parasailing
(X) Been on TV
(X) Done something you told yourself you wouldn't
( ) Learned to play an instrument well

(I was excited until I saw the "well" part)

(X) Made prank phone calls
(X) Fallen hopelessly in love
( ) Been down Bourbon Street in New Orleans
(X) Laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose
( ) Fed an elephant
(X) Caught a snowflake on your tongue
( ) Had a child
(X) Fired a gun
(X) Danced in the rain
( ) Been to the Opera
(X) Written a letter to Santa Claus
( ) Serenaded someone
(X) Seen a U.S.President in person
( ) Been kissed under the mistletoe
( ) Been to Africa
(X) Watched the sunrise with someone
( ) Driven a race car
(X) Been to a National Museum
(X) Dyed your hair
(X) Been to a Wax Museum
( ) Seen Mount Rushmore
(X) Eaten caviar
(X) Broken a bone

(Just toes. Nothing too serious - which is surprising, as I'm a world class klutz.)

(X) Blown bubbles
(X) Gone ice-skating
( ) Been scuba diving/snorkeling
(X) Gone to the movies
( ) Been deep sea fishing
( ) Driven across the United States
( ) Been in a hot air balloon
( ) Been sky diving

(I TOTALLY want to though!)

( ) Gone snowmobiling
( ) Lived in more than one country
(X) Learned a foreign language

(It doesn't say fluently!!)

(X) Lay down outside at night and admired the stars while listening to the crickets
(X) Seen a falling star and made a wish
( ) Enjoyed the beauty of Old Faithful Geyser
(X) Seen the Grand Canyon
( ) Seen the Statue of Liberty
( ) Gone to the top of Seattle Space Needle
( ) Been on a cruise
(X) Traveled by train
( ) Traveled by motorcycle
(X) Been horse back riding
(X) Ridden on a San Francisco cable car
(X) Been to Disneyland OR Disney World
(X) Truly believe in the power of prayer
(X) Been in a rain forest

(A Washington state rainforest - it still counts!! It's just not tropical!)

(X) Seen whales in the ocean
( ) Been to Niagara Falls
( ) Ridden on an elephant
( ) Swam with dolphins
( ) Been to the Olympics
( ) Walked on the Great Wall of China
( ) Saw and heard a glacier calf
( ) Been spinnaker flying
(X) Been water-skiing/wakeboarding
(X) Been snow-skiing/snowboarding
( ) Been to Westminster Abbey
( ) Been to the Louvre
( ) Swam in the Mediterranean

(Someday, I will do those things. Someday...)

(X) Been to a Major League Baseball game
( ) Been to a National Football League game
( ) Been Married
( ) Been Divorced
( ) Swam with sharks

(and I would do that WHY???)

( ) Been White Water Rafting
(X) Seen a Broadway show

(Just not ON Broadway)

( ) Written a book or screen play


I don't really know why I did this and posted this on here. I'm not even going to announce or shamelessly self-promote this entry as I usually do.

I guess I really just don't want to do my homework.

Peace out, yall!

There I go, thinking again...

Here are a few thoughts of mine while I’m writing my special expose’ about strippers. I know you’re all super-excited and can’t wait for that entry, but my dears, you’ll just have to be patient.

1. I was doing a search for a hot picture of Matt Bellamy (that’s redundant isn’t it?? I mean, come on, have you seen the man?! So pretty…) to put as my background on my work computer today and while typing in Matt’s name, there was a Google suggestion of “Matthew Bellamy’s girlfriend.” Me being the naturally curious person that I am – rather like a cat – I followed the suggestion and was somewhat surprised to find that the suggestion yielded truthful results.

Upon viewing said girlfriend of Hottie Rock Star, I had my “aha” moment. Because Chicky-babe is SUH-MOKIN’ hot. (I am comfortable with my sexuality to be able to appreciate another woman’s smoking hotness.) My surprise vanished and I was left temporarily heartbroken.

Why was I heartbroken, you may ask? Surely Melodye, you should know that the chances of meeting a celebrity are slim and the chances of dating said celebrity are even slimmer, you might say. I’m well aware of the practically non-existent odds, okay. I’m not NAÏVE. (Maybe I am, a little. But I think it could be endearing.)

It’s just…well, I don’t think I’m alone if I say that I have this fantasy of meeting one of the men on my List, him falling truly, madly, deeply in love with me and ditching his model girlfriend and running away to Paris with me. I think a lot of people have that fantasy about the people on their Lists.

And PS: why do ALL of the men on my list have model girlfriends? That must be proof of my extremely good taste in men. (Don’t look at me like that. You knew going into this that I have a big ego.)

Sigh. C’est la vie, right?

2. Who came up with the idea of making the response to an error message be “OK”? What if the error is not okay? It is not okay if Internet Explorer suffers a fatal error and has to shut down. It is not okay if my computer has to restart because of something that the software did. And it is NOT okay if Word stops responding and I lose my midterm paper after being up all night working on it. (And don’t give me that “you should save every 5 minutes” crap. That’s what auto-save is for. Bite me.)

I think a more appropriate response to an error message would be “Fine.” Why “fine” you ask?

Well, as I have mentioned before, if someone (especially a woman) says they are “fine”, that means that they are the exact opposite of “fine.” “Fine” really means “Bob, get the kids into the minivan because the world is about to come to an end.” Hearing someone say that they are fine should get your spider senses tingling and your self-preservation instinct should be set at “flee”.

If my extensive and ridiculous hyperboles have failed to drive the point home to you: “Fine” means DEFCON One. (Cue the scary music: dun dun DUN!)

That is why, my pretties, “Fine” would be a better error message response. This way, the computer knows that you’re pissed off; but you know that there’s nothing you can do because the computer’s going to do whatever the hell it wants to do regardless of your feelings.

I think that Microsoft and Apple should consider my idea. It would be an improvement. I'm waiting for their calls.

3. I feel like I should clear something up after that last point. Saying that someone is “fine” is perfectly okay. That is a compliment. Compliments are good. Should I use it in a sentence for you so you understand? Okay. I can do that.

“Melodye, you are FINE.” Or: “Melodye, you are a fine example of womanly beauty.”

Do you see the distinction? Good. Those are excellent examples of “fine” usage.

4. My ten-year high school reunion is coming up. I don’t feel like that can possibly true. I swear to you that I was just walking across that stage, getting my high school diploma, and screaming with my friends.

Am I going to my high school reunion?

Is the Pope Jewish? (HAH! You thought I was going to say “Catholic” didn’t you. Psyched you out, sucker.)

No WAY am I going to that. Why would I want to go back and see all the people that used to make fun of me? I got made fun of a LOT in high school.

But Melodye, that was ten years ago and you’ve changed – heck, they’ve changed! You could say that. You could be right. I should probably just get over it. Forgive and forget.

I’m not going.

5. I just saw a commercial for the DVD release of “Twilight.” Wal-Mart is making a big deal about having the movie available for sale at 12:01 am on March 21st. Now, okay. (Fine. Hehe)

I enjoyed the movie very much – I was there for the midnight premiere the day it opened in theaters. I was crazy exhausted at work the next day, but it was SO MUCH FUN. I went and saw the movie again, the night before Thanksgiving. (I did have some issues with the movie but that’s not the point of this.)

However.

I find the attempt to recreate the same hype and excitement for the DVD release as was created for the theatrical release to be lame and pathetic.

There. I’ve said it. I regret nothing!

The most wonderful time of the year...

These are on sale!

I LOVE this candy.

It only comes once a year for Easter and then the government takes it away again. We'll all be depressed and it will be a sad day when it's gone, although not so much for me because I usually stock up on this fantastically amazing candy. So I'll be eating the candy of the gods in August, while dear reader, you will be despondent because you, like the idiot grasshopper, did not hoard your supply for the long, dark winter.

And don't think I'll be like the benevolent ants in that story or whatever those nasty bugs were. Oh no.

To quote Jack Handey: Just as bees will swarm about to protect their nest so will I 'swarm about' to protect my nest of chocolate eggs.

Buy your own Mini-eggs. These are mine.

It's The Most Wonderful Time
It's The Most Wonderful Time
It's The Most Wonderful Time Of The Yeeeeaaaaarrrrrrrr!

My love-hate relationship with Facebook...

Melodye is on the phone. 11:30 am
Melodye is eating lunch. 12:33 pm
Melodye is at work. 12:36 pm

I’m not going to lie or front: I love Facebook. I’m so addicted to it. I’m constantly checking my account to see if anyone has messaged me, commented on my status, or written on my wall. I love that I have been able to reconnect with my cousins whom I rarely see and friends from different eras in my life. I enjoy seeing pictures of children, spouses, pets, and fun places people have traveled to.

Pretty much my only beef is this. There is a plague running amuck on Facebook.

It’s called FISUD: Frequent Inane Status Update Disorder. It should be added to the ICD-IX soon. (look for it.)

I’m sorry, but I do not need to know when a person is out of string cheese, enjoying a vanilla-scented candle, or waiting for their BFF to call, all within a fifteen minute period.

Do not think I am exaggerating, fair reader: nay, but I speak the truth when I say I saw that sequence of status updates once upon a Wednesday.

I realize that I’m probably going to get upset comments, maybe even lose some Facebook friends because of this. So don’t get me wrong: I like seeing status updates. They’re entertaining, fun, and a good insight on people.

I’m guilty of inane status update disorder, too. I’m prone to adapt movie quotes or song lyrics and see how many people can figure out what I’m quoting.

But, correct me if I’m wrong: I think that maybe, just MAYBE there is a difference between a movie quote once every few hours or more, as opposed to “Melodye is eating a muffin,” followed closely by “Melodye is flossing her teeth.”

Right?

I need to get back to my paper about strippers and my adventure going to the strip club for a school project. Which, now that I think about it, may be worthy of a blog write-up soon. I’ll get on that. Really.

Tomorrow’s status update: Melodye has been tackled by the Hulk and put in a sleeper hold for making fun of FISUD-afflicted Facebook friends.

In which I take the easy way out...

It's been awhile since I posted. My most humble, abject, and SINCERE apologies.

Not really. I'm busy, you know.

That being said, I'm taking the easy way out and posting a survey. Have fun.

Annnnnnd....we're off!

1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? Not that I know of. Mom got the "unique" spelling of my name from the Prologue of Canterbury Tales, though.

2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? last night while watching "My Girl". I forgot how sad that freaking movie is.

3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? meh

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCHMEAT? chicken salad from Panera

5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS? none that I know of

6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU ? I don't know. I'm kind of mean sometimes.

7.DO YOU USE SARCASM? Noooooo.....have you ever met me???

8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS? Yes

9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? yep!

10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? Cap'n Crunch with Crunchberries, Frosted Mini-wheats, and Lucky Charms

11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES BEFORE YOU TAKE THEM OFF? I don't really wear the type of shoes you untie

12.WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICECREAM? The Ben and Jerry ice creams that were inspired by John Lennon and Stephen Colbert

13. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? eyes, smile, and hair

14. RED OR PINK? both!

15. WHAT IS YOUR LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOUR SELF? my sweet tooth

16. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? anyone I don't get to see often enough

17. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO COMPLETE THIS LIST ? I don't care

18. WHAT COLOR ARE YOUR PANTS AND SHOES YOU ARE WEARING? pink pajama pants and black fuzzy slippers

19. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? nothing

20. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON ,WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? red

21. FAVORITE SMELL? cookies baking, yummy cologne, and rain

22. WHO WAS THE PERSON YOU TALKED TO LAST ON THE PHONE? I dunno

23. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON THAT SENT THIS TO YOU ? Yes

24. HAIR COLOR? multicolored

25. EYE COLOR? green

26. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? Yes

27. FAVORITE FOOD? Italian

28. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? both!

29.LAST MOVIE WATCHED? "The Magic Christian" on DVD and "Shopaholic" in the theater

30. WHAT IS THE COLOR OF THE SHIRT YOU ARE WEARING? gray

31. SUMMER OR WINTER? I like both

32. HUGS OR KISSES? both, depending on who is delivering

33. FAVORITE DESSERT? tiramisu and cheesecake

34.MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND? no one, since it's my blog

35.LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND? see above

36. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING RIGHT NOW? "The Undercover Economist" by Tim Harford, "The Wealth of Nations" by Adam Smith, and "Atlas Shrugged" by Ayn Rand

37. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? don't have one

38. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT? I watched some DVDs before heading to the UNLV-BYU game

39. FAVORITE SOUNDS? music and my nephew laughing

40. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES? Beatles, Beatles, Beatles!

41. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE EVER BEEN FROM HOME? Washington DC. I need to get out more.

42. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT ? I have been told I'm a decent singer

43. WHERE WERE YOU BORN? Tucson, AZ

44. WHOSE ANSWERS ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO GETTING BACK? no one

45. HOW DID YOU MEET YOUR SPOUSE /SIGNIFICANT OTHER? I'm single

46. IS THE CUP HALF FULL OR HALF EMPTY? I just want to know where the hell the rest of my soda is.

47. IF YOU COULD SIT DOWN TO DINNER WITH FIVE PEOPLE WHO WOULD YOU PICK? Joseph Smith Jr, John Lennon, Johnny Depp, Britney Spears, and Anne Boleyn - what an interesting dinner THAT would be!

48. IF YOU COULD REDO YOUR YOUNGER YEARS WOULD YOU ? I would go back and apply myself at school, but other than that, no. I've learned too many valuable lessons.

49. WHAT DO YOU LOVE ABOUT YOURSELF THE MOST? I'm fairly easy-going and when I want to, I can really turn on the charm.

50. ANIMAL PERSON OR NOT AN ANIMAL PERSON? I love animals

**Sorry, no playlist this time.

Seinfeld in Blog Form

This post has no point. So don’t think it’s going to be particularly enlightening. It’s kind of the blog equivalent to Seinfeld. It’s a post about nothing.

Ye be forewarned.

Two funny things happened this week:

1. As mentioned before, I am sadly lacking in interpretation skills. This is not limited to music lyrics, but also poetry and symbolism. Sadly, symbolism is lost on me. I’m not so great with the symbolism, which is why I remain silent on that subject matter whenever it’s brought up. (It’s also one reason why I’m not great with Isaiah and Revelations in the Bible.)

Ladies and gentlemen for your viewing pleasure: Exhibit A, this recent exchange between my mom and I after reading The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini (spoilers ahead) (fantastic book, by the way):

Mom: I found it interesting how Amir’s father paid for Hassan’s harelip to be fixed when Amir and Hassan were young and how ironic it was that Amir’s lip was scarred in the same way as a harelip while fighting to free Hassan’s son from slavery. What did you think about the symbolism of that?

Melodye: [blank stare] I thought…it was…very symbolic... becauseofthesymbolism.

Mom: [silence, as she looks at me in disbelief, then walks away.]

(There was no slack-jawed drooling.)

Poor Mom. First her kids make fun of her stamp collection and then she can’t even have a basic literary discussion with her daughter.

I paraphrased what Mom said, by the way. My short-term memory is not what it used to be and my mom is a very smart lady and can put sentences better much more cromulently than I can.

You’d think Mom would have learned her lesson from that unfortunate exchange but Mom tried again. This time it was about philosophy. I will spare you the gory details. Suffice to say that it was PAINFUL.

2. Another highlight of my week so far: tripping over my own two feet in the middle of the Student Union. It wouldn't have been so bad, except that it was five minutes after classes let out and it was PACKED. I got a lot of whistles, laughs, and various versions of "Way to go!" Oh well. Maybe I'll get a funny nickname like "That One Girl Who Trips Over Nothing" or "Trip Girl" for short.

On the upside, here is what I’m listening to this week:

1. “Thinking of You” by Katy Perry
2. “Not As We” by Alanis Morrisette
3. “If I Were a Boy” by Beyonce
4. “Twisted Transistor” by Korn
5. “Sober” by Pink
6. “Forever” by Chris Brown
7. “You’re Gonna Go Far, Kid” by The Offspring
8. “In My Place” by Coldplay
9. “Heart Songs” by Weezer
10. “Second Chance” by Shinedown
11. “I’m Outta Time” by Oasis
12. “Disturbia” by Rihanna
13. “Eye of the Tiger” by Survivor
14. “Untouched” by The Veronicas
15. “Paper Planes” by M.I.A.

No Muse. I'm shocked.

Peace, love, and chocolate.

Music Appreciation

With a name like Melodye, I suppose it was inevitable that I should wind up loving music. I collect music. I collect it like some people collect Hummel figurines, shot glasses, and the way my mom collects stamps. (yeah, my mom has a stamp collection. My brother, sister, and I all love to tease her about it.)

I love listening to the way the melodies (heh) and harmonies all weave together to form the music. I love a strong pounding bass line and drums. I love how music can instantly change your mood – how a fast song can make you feel like dancing, a hard heavy metal can make you feel like a rock star, and how slow piano music can instantly calm you down. I love feeling the texture of my favorite songs. (Yes, music has a texture. If you don’t get it, talk to me. I’ll educate you.)

I also love words. I enjoy finding a new word and rolling it around my mouth; getting used to and savoring the taste of it in my mouth like a piece of new and exotic chocolate. I like to use new words in my daily conversation and continue on my quest to find even more new words to fall in love with.

But I’m not so good with lyric interpretation. My appreciation of song lyrics mainly goes towards the arrangement of words. As a [wannabe] writer, I enjoy the way the words are combined and how the songwriter chose to put the words together. John Lennon, Noel Gallagher, Matthew Bellamy, and Brandon Flowers are some of my favorite songwriters because of the words they choose and how they’re arranged.

My appreciation also extends to the way the song makes me feel, the way the song makes me think, to the picture that is made in my head when I hear it. I enjoy the imagery that words produce in my mind.

Again, as a wannabe writer (of songs, books, articles, you name it), I wish my writing could compare to the writing of these three songs:

1. This is a recent discovery of mine, thanks to a good friend.

There's a shark shaped fin
In the water of my dreams
An alligator screams from the depths there
I'd swim with you there
I'd swim with you there, yeah yeah

In the house that I use
There's a psycho on the loose
He's playing with the fuse of a bomb there
I could live with you there
I could live with you there

Bye bye long day
I need to sleep so much
You shine on me
Too much is not enough

On the sheets and pillow case
In my bed for heaven's sake
The devil's dancing until late in my head there
But I could sleep with you there
I could sleep with you there
Fripp – Catherine Wheel

WOW! Holy CRAP do I love these lyrics. “There’s a shark shaped fin in the water of my dreams.” I’m not so hot with the symbolism but can’t you just picture a nightmare coming at you in those words? Can I just tell you how much I wish I’d written that??

2. John Lennon. Need I say more?

Living is easy with eyes closed
Misunderstanding all you see.
It’s getting hard to be someone.
But it all works out,
It doesn’t matter much to me.

Let me take you down,
‘Cos I’m going to Strawberry Fields.
Nothing is real
And nothing to get hungabout.
Strawberry Fields forever.

No one I think is in my tree,
I mean it must be high or low.
That is you can’t you know tune in.
But it’s all right.
That is I think it’s not too bad…
Strawberry Fields Forever – The Beatles

This is a John Lennon special; almost no help from Paul on this one (if any). I do get the symbolism in this one (thanks to my Beatles appreciation class at UNLV – most fun class ever!). I love how John is saying no one really gets him; he’s either so smart that no one can keep up with him, or so dumb that no one would bother trying to understand him. I also love the line about living is easy with your eyes closed and misunderstanding all you see. (Okay, we all know that I’m a major Beatles fan.)

3. From the album that inspired Sgt. Pepper…

I may not always love you
But long as there are stars above you
You never need to doubt it
I’ll make you so sure about it

God only knows what I’d be without you

If you should ever leave me
Though life would still go on believe me
The world could show nothing to me
So what good would living do me

God only knows what I’d be without you
God only knows what I’d be without you

If you should ever leave me
Well life would still go on believe me
The world could show nothing to me
So what good would living do me
God Only Knows – The Beach Boys

Yes, the same Boys who brought you Surfin’ USA and Fun, Fun, Fun. I truly love this song. The pure emotion in this song brought tears to my eyes the first time I heard it. The speaker in the song is unabashed and unashamed to demonstrate the love he/she has for their significant other. (I’m being politically correct here. How am I doing?) Brian Wilson (the Beach Boy who authored the song) is a genius. ‘Nuff said.

There are many songs that I wish I could have written: these are but a few. I don't wish I had written these songs for the monetary rewards (though that would be welcome), but for the level of depth and emotion that are conveyed through the arrangement of commonplace words. None of the words used in these songs are particularly fancy or difficult – but because of the context and feeling behind the placement, the words have become more meaningful.

Rock on. (but really listen to the lyrics too.)

**These lyrics were NOT used with permission from their respective writers/estates, however: I lay no claim to these wonderful songs and hope that all who read this humble article will take my use in the spirit that it is intended.

In which I shamelessly beg for your help

I've made it an unofficial policy of mine not to use this blog in a shameless manner. I don’t think anyone really wants to read about my political beliefs. But I’m going to take this time to ask for your help.

Nevada education is in serious trouble. Due to the current state of the economy, the governor is proposing massive cuts in education to help balance the state's budget. These proposed cuts would cause massive tuition increases, layoffs of teachers and staff, fewer available classes, and elimination of degree programs. These proposed cuts not only endanger higher education in Nevada, but also elementary and secondary education. Again, that means much less money for teachers, increased class sizes, and other catastrophic changes. Schools are still reeling from budget cuts in 2007.

I, and so many of my friends here, attend Nevada colleges - I attend University of Nevada, Las Vegas and am majoring in Economics. I know a lot of teachers in the Clark County School District – many of them are my friends, too. My friends’ jobs are in danger because of the governor’s “solution” to Nevada’s budget problems. Some of my friends’ degree programs are first on the chopping block. My major is in danger, as well (which really doesn’t make sense. We need MORE economists now than ever!)

You Nevada residents who aren’t in college or don’t have any kids in school can’t afford to be complacent. Example: one dollar that the state puts into UNLV generates $4.50 in the local economy. That’s not counting the College of Southern Nevada or Nevada State College. That’s not including University of Nevada, Reno. That’s not including the community colleges in the smaller towns throughout the rest of the state. There is real economic growth in danger, if these budget cuts are passed.

Nevada is 49th in the nation in education. Nevada has one of the highest drop-out rates. Why, then, is the governor taking AWAY from education? Shouldn’t he be putting more INTO education? If it were me, I’d be embarrassed to be the governor of a state with such terrible statistics. These budget cuts are making Nevada education worth even less than it already is.

In a few short years, my niece and nephew will be attending Nevada schools. Some of you may have children that already attend these schools. Some of you may be alumni of Nevada schools. Do you want your children to attend schools that have been chipped away at until there is nothing left? Do you want your Nevada college degree to be worthless?

I’m urging you – no, I’m begging you. Please go to www.savenevadastudents.org and send the form letter to both your Assembly and Senate representatives. It does not take very long to do and there is a link to help you locate your representatives, if you don’t know who they are. I know that I have readers – please don’t count on someone else to make a stand. Stand with the rest of us.

These budget cuts should not, must not, and cannot happen. And with your help, I have faith that they will not happen.

To my faithful readers – don’t worry. The hilarity, wacky, and zany posts will resume soon.

Some original poetry...

What with starting classes this week, buying some new SUPER FUN toys, and dealing with the evil bitch flu from hell, I haven't had time to write anything funny, insightful, or enlightening. Hopefully you will all forgive me, especially with this offering.

I wrote this for my Western Lit class last semester and (of course) got a resounding A+++ on it. A little background: I had to do a research paper on Candide by Voltaire. I, being the notorious procrastinator that I am, left most of it until the last minute (being November 4th, as it was due November 5th.) (I also got a resounding A+++ on that paper as well. Mad writing skills, yall.)

Enjoy!

The Server

Once upon a weeknight weary, while I surfed the web, oh nearly
did I find what I was searching for.
While the mouse clicked, quickly I picked
something that might maybe fit, fit what I was searching for.
One more reference is what I was searching for,
this I needed and nothing more.

Oh how dreary that November; blocked it out, but I remember
the paper I was researching for.
How I wished I’d started sooner and not gone to see that crooner,
but I was up with the lunar, lunar part of November four.
It seemed I’d been up for forever on that long dark day of four,
trying to find what I was searching for.

Suddenly a link looked right, and though the monitor was bright,
I double-clicked to load the page I’d been searching all night for.
Eagerly I sat there waiting, excitedly anticipating,
but at the same time I was hating, hating what I was looking for.
When the page stopped: not what I’d been searching for,
quoth the server, 404.

“What?” said I, refreshing, “network timeout, I am guessing.
It must be here, the site I’m searching for.”
Faster then my heart was beating, faster still the mouse was speeding,
almost crying I was pleading, pleading with the gods of yore.
Let it be there, let me find this page I’m searching for:
said the server, 404.

“There’s no way this link is broken,” in disbelief this phrase was spoken,
“This error message is mistaken; keep from me that 404.”
Quietly the laptop hummed, loudly then my heartbeat drummed.
Steadily I grew more bummed, bummed more than I was before.
“Please!” I cried, “I need some more of Voltaire’s lore!”
Still the server: 404.

“You wretched thing!” I swore, “with this bad news that you bring,
now show the page I’m searching for!”
Then my eyes, they started stinging, as the pop-up kept on pinging.
Without mercy it was ringing, ringing for this page no more.
One more time, I tried the page, hopeless to my very core –
mocked the server: 404.

This so ends my tale of woe, lovingly ripped off from Edgar Poe,
I never found the page my search was for.
And now my sadness has turned to madness,
wrought upon me by mere gladness, gladness from that 404.
Now I hide inside my room, locked behind a heavy door,
here I stay, forever more.

(If you didn't figure it out, it's a parody of Edgar Allen Poe's "The Raven". )

**I'd like to thank Edgar Allen Poe for his unauthorized, unwitting, and I'm sure, unwanted use and unholy butchering of his masterpiece. Thanks Ed!

I have a terrible secret...

I have a terrible, shameful secret to confess to y’all. This is so much worse than when I confessed to my addiction to Guitar Hero; much worse than my desire to have one of my future offspring be able to belch the entire alphabet in one go; and a little bit worse than my continuing to play late 90s boy band music.

I am so embarrassed to admit this, I don’t even know if I can. People will want to lock me up away because clearly, I have lost my mind. Ohhhhh am I going to be able to do this? Just do it, Melodye. Do it quickly like ripping off a band-aid. Here goes:

I really want the Richard Simmons: Sweating to the Oldies DVD set.

I know, I know! I’m sick! I’m INSANE, even. What sane person wants to see those candy-striped short shorts bouncing up and down? What NORMAL person voluntarily pays money to see a grown man in bedazzled tank tops yelling out: “Say farewell to fat!”

But the Time Life commercial for the DVD set looked so fun. I’m tired of my boring work-out – I want to have fun when I’m getting all sweaty. And I really LIKE oldies! “I’m So Excited” by the Pointer Sisters? Classic! Who wouldn’t want to sweat to that?!

And you know what? Richard Simmons really cares about those fat ladies behind him sweating to the oldies. That’s nice of him.

This is a really short post, but I’m kind of ashamed of myself. I think I’ll go put on Carmen Electra’s Strip-Aerobics, just so I can get my self-respect back.





Clearly, I DESERVE to be locked away, but I can’t help it.

What I'm Listening To...

I love music. I listen to music constantly and if I don’t have some form of music playing, I get a little antsy. I have been known to listen to the ring tones on my cell phone when desperate. That being said, here are ten songs that I currently can’t get enough of. In no particular order, here we go:

“Seemed Like the Thing to Do” by Dinosaur Jr.

Dinosaur Jr. is one of my more recent “discoveries” thanks to Guitar Hero. (I’m not ashamed to admit it) I'm a little late "discovering" them as they've been around for a while, but I already love them. Their song “Feel the Pain” is featured on Guitar Hero: World Tour and Rock Band 2, and while I do love that song; it’s this offering from the same 1994 album, Without a Sound, which I’m really digging.

“I Wish” by Skee-Lo

Released in 1995 and the title track of his first album, Skee-Lo raps about how he wishes he was just a little bit taller. I love doing my signature lame dance moves to this song, even when I’m rocking out in my office and my coworkers can see me.

“Pretend That You’re All Alone” by Keane

This is on Keane’s 2008 album, Perfect Symmetry. This is fun because it's got an awesome beat and a nice peppy sound. I like to play this when I’m in my office. It's perfect for when I'm ready to go off on someone because it calms me down and gets my head boppin'.

“Promise” by Eve 6

On the same 2000 album, Horrorscope, as the better known “Here’s to the Night”, but still a hit in its own right, “Promise” is a fun song to listen to.

“Best I Ever Had (Grey Sky Morning)” by Vertical Horizon

This appeared on the 1999 Everything You Want album, but was not released as a single until 2001. I LOVE this song. It’s not technically a love song, but a good reflection on love lost. I seriously can’t get enough of this song. I play it ALL THE TIME.

“Human” by The Killers

A super-fun dance track from The Killers’ 2008 album, Day & Age, this song rocks my world. I’m pleased to say that I have this single on a 45 rpm which is on WHITE vinyl. Totally cool!

“Starlight” by Muse

You didn’t think I could do a list of songs I love without mentioning Muse, did you? Silly reader. I love me some Muse! “Starlight” is from Muse’s 2006 album Black Holes & Revelations and is one of my absolute favorite songs by this band. Even though it’s a total larynx-shredder (mad props to Matthew Bellamy for being able to rock this), I love belting it out in my car. I am proud to say that I have this song on a 45 rpm as well (limited edition picture record: Yay me!)

“Knockin’ on Heaven’s Door” by Guns’N’Roses

This Bob Dylan cover appeared on the 1991 album Use Your Illusion II, after being a regular in GNR’s live shows. “Knockin’” is a rare song about dying that doesn’t sound morbid. I can listen to this song over and over again without getting depressed, thanks to Axel Rose’s singing.

“Incredulous Love” by Demophon

As of now, this song is unreleased. Demophon is a band that is made up of a good friend of mine. This song is on his Myspace music page and I simply can’t get enough of it. The only thing preventing me from rocking out to it more is that it’s currently limited to the music page, however; I have been PROMISED a CD of completed tracks. I highly recommend you go to the website and have a listen to “Incredulous Love” as well as the other tracks. www.myspace.com/demophonmusic

“If You Seek Amy” by Britney Spears

This one is the upcoming third single from the 2008 album, Circus. This seems like it could be innocuous, however, once you listen to the lyrics, Britney is actually being pretty naughty. I’m actually surprised that this one is the third single – I would have thought the censors wouldn’t have let this through. This is one of my favorite tracks from Britney’s second comeback album and it totally rocks. “Amy” is another song I like to goof off and dance to in my office. (My poor co-workers.)


This list isn’t all-inclusive – I’ve got a ton of songs that I’m loving right now. These are just top on my list. If you don’t like them, too bad. It’s my blog. :D

I just noticed that there are a lot of power ballads on this list. What can I say? They rock.

**Update 1/12:

I seem to have left these off of my list. MY BAD.

“Pony (It’s Okay)” by Erin McCarley

One of my co-workers told me about this song last week. I downloaded it from iTunes and have not been able to stop playing it since. Just because I neglected to include this song in no way diminishes my total infatuation. Check out her late 2008 debut album Love, Save the Empty. She sounds like Sara Bareilles - which, while I'm not a fan of Sara, is apparently not a bad thing.

"Mansard Roof" by Vampire Weekend

I really don't know how I neglected Vampire Weekend. If I was Catholic, I'd go to Confession. "Roof" is an AWESOME song. Vampire Weekend is an eclectic mix of African pop and Western classical music and the resulting sound kicks MAJOR bootay. "Roof" is from VW's eponymous first album, released early 2008. If you haven't picked it up, DO IT.

"Exit Music (For a Film)" by Radiohead

"Exit Music" plays at the end (fittingly) of Baz Luhrman's Romeo and Juliet and is amay-zuh-zing. While not on any of the R&J soundtracks, "Exit Music" shows up on Radiohead's 1997 album OK Computer. This song is dark and brooding and I love it.

"Talk Tonight" by Oasis

This 1995 song was a B-side to another favorite song, "Some Might Say" and was included on the B-side compilation album, The Masterplan, released in 1998. "Talk" was written during a tough time in Oasis' history (there's a shock) and is basically about how someone talked Noel Gallagher out of jumping off the ledge. It seems like it would be a bit dark, but "Talk" is so heartfelt and open, it's not too depressing.

Last but not least:

"Sunday Morning Call" by Oasis

"Sunday" is one of my absolute favorite songs. Out of all the songs that are on my favorites list, this one is high up there. I'm very pleased to say that I have this song on a 12-inch single (vinyl, for you un-initiated) The only down part of my acquisition: the single has NEVER been opened. I CAN'T open it. I just can't. So I have to just look at it. But it's okay. "Sunday" is from the 2000 album Standing on the Shoulder of Giants, which sadly, was critically panned. But do I care? NOOOOOO! (Oasis is one of my favorite bands ever, so don't be so shocked they show up here twice.)

I considered just waiting to do another what I'm listening to post, but didn't know when that would be. So ergo, the update. Don't get pissy. :D

Dating 101

Dating is supposed to be fun, right? Dinner and a movie; bowling; a sporting event; miniature golf; concerts; what’s not fun about those activities? The basic idea is for you get to know someone and decide if you want to spend more time with that person, and if not, hopefully you had a good time and made a friend. If you didn’t have a good time and make a new friend, well then, I’m sorry for you. Now you know what you don’t like.

But when you’re dating, you constantly wonder where you stand. Now women, we usually dissect and discuss our most recent dates ad nauseum. We go over every look, touch, gesture, and voice inflection until the date has been pulled into pieces, and we get EVERYONE's opinions. The questions “Does he like me? Is he going to call me today? What did he mean when he said…?” are repeated over and over with no real satisfying answer. (Or until our girlfriends get sick of the subject and start saying “Just ASK HIM what that meant!”)

Men are pretty straightforward. If they like you, they call. To quote an upcoming movie: If he’s not calling you, not sleeping with you, not marrying you, then he’s JUST NOT INTO YOU. Men pretty much know what they want. And that is fantastic.

But what about those few and far between guys who don’t seem to know what they want? What about those guys who send mixed signals? What about those guys that seem genuinely interested but then sporadically call you? Why does the chase seem to be all that some men want? What is so fulfilling about the chase?? If you’re LDS, as I am, the CHASE doesn’t get you anything! Hello! The CATCH does! Remember how much more fun playing Tag was when you caught the person???

Don’t worry, men. I’m not just going to bag on you in this. It’s not like women are open books. I should know. I am one, so I know all of our tricks and have made good use of them. I know how to make full use of the sidelong glance, the slow smile…and what we REALLY mean when we say we’re “fine”. (“Fine” is NEVER good, for those men who haven’t been the recipient of one of those “what women really mean” e-mails. You don’t want to hear a woman say she’s “fine” because she’s not.)

See, we women are pretty wily. We’ll act like we’re innocent, all wide eyes and blushes, but we know what we’re doing. We know how to make you want us and if we don’t want you, then we know how to make you NOT want us. Ever seen “How to Lose a Guy in Ten Days”? There’s some truth to that movie. Women are confusing and yeah, sometimes we play games. But hey, men: SO DO YOU.

I’ve gotten some flak for not accepting every date offer I’ve gotten. Some people have said, if a guy has the balls to ask you out, he deserves a date. Maybe that’s true. But I figure, why should I waste some poor guy’s time and money when I know that I’m not going to want to go on that second date? And who wants to go on a pity date??

So I let guys down nice and easy, because I’ve been declined before myself and I have been the pity date. It sucks. But I don’t let the guy think that he has a chance when he doesn’t. So guys: don’t lead us on and make us think we have a shot when we don’t. That sucks, too.

Ahhhh, dating.

So you go out on the first date and you have a good time. Then when you do go out with someone on that second date, then third, fourth, and so on, it’s practically the equivalent of another Geneva Convention when determining if you’re “official” or not. Witnesses must be called, boundary lines drawn, and neutral territories established. Defining the Relationship talks can be unpleasant because that’s when one or both parties reveal just how COMMITTED they are. It’s pretty hard to find out that you are more into the other person than they are into you.

If you’ve gotten past the DTR stage and came out with a significant other, it’s not like you can rest on your laurels. Oh no. You have to worry about ANNIVERSARIES. Lucky for whomever I date, I am not one of those girls who celebrate how many weeks it’s been since we first held hands, kissed, or wore the same color shirts by accident and thus proving how perfect for each other we are. (To be honest, I can barely remember what days that kind of stuff happens, let alone remember to celebrate it!)

Don’t take my rant the wrong way. Dating can be a ton of fun. I am very into dating. I wish I did more of it. Wooo! Go dating! It’s nice having a significant other. It’s awesome having someone who wants to be seen in public with you, who will hold your hand while walking down the street, and who wants to make out with you more than once. (WOOO! Making out! Yeah!)

But being the Crazy Cat Lady is becoming more and more of an attractive, and let’s face it; inevitable, alternative to dating these days. With cats, you never have to worry about where you stand. It’s simple: they’re the boss. You’re the bringer of food, the lap provider, and ear scratcher. A DTR is not necessary. Really, any talking is not necessary with a cat. Cats actually prefer that you don’t talk to them. They already know they own you.

I guess what I’m really trying to say here is that regardless of what gender you are (or prefer), the Golden Rule should really apply to dating (as well as everything else.) If you don’t want to be jerked around, then don’t jerk other people around. If you want someone to treat you with respect, then you need to treat them with respect. If you don't want someone to play games with you, well maybe you need to re-evaluate and see if you're the one playing games. Are you picking up what I’m putting down? Is the sprinkler hitting the grass? Do you see how this works?

Don’t say you’re playing Tag if all you’re doing is running.

Peace, love, and much chocolate to all.

I guess I should start working on my slovenly appearance and talking in gibberish...

My cats are jealous of my laptop

Yes, you read that right. The cats are jealous of the laptop.

They think they are the rightful occupants of my lap, not that thing which is clearly not a cat. One of them in particular, (we’ll call him “Fluffy” to protect the not-so-innocent) perceives my keystrokes as petting and chin scratching of which he should be receiving. Whenever I am working on my laptop, Fluffy sits next to my chair and glares balefully at the intruder of his space (as he is literally doing right now as I write this).

Fluffy has attempted to camp out on my lap even when I’m using my computer, but as we know, two objects cannot occupy the same space at one time, and he gets unceremoniously shoved onto the floor. I’ve reminded him that in this house, we obey the laws of physics, but he’s a cat. He doesn’t care.

Holstein—oops, I mean Fluffy just hissed at the laptop. It’s not the first time. The laptop is unperturbed when he does this.

Fluffy glares with a vengeance, though. You can just see the feline vitriol shooting through his gaze and if looks could kill, the laptop would have a virus. (Then I imagine that my cat would assume a smug look worthy of Jeff Goldblum and manage to think the words “The package has been delivered.” Then maybe that non-feline metal bastard would care.)

Fluffy’s brother, “Stupid” (name changed to protect the…well, stupid) does not share as much of his brother’s antipathy towards the metal lap-stealer. Stupid sits and yowls for a minute, then does the feline equivalent of shrugging and wanders over to the food bowl.

You would think that Stupid would bear the brunt of Fluffy’s familial attacks, but I don’t call them the Brothers Dim for nothing. Stupid is spared Fluffy attacks and the laptop is mercilessly glared at and taunted. (“Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries!”)

I have considered doing what any frazzled mother who is tired of fighting children does: forcing Fluffy, Stupid, and my computer to hug and yell at them “You are all going to LOVE each other!”

Don’t worry, I haven’t done that. The cats would just glare at me and the computer doesn’t have arms with which to hug.

I have an older brother and a younger sister so I am no stranger to sibling fighting. It’s a part of life when you have siblings – knuckle punches, Hertz donuts, Smurf bites, Indian burns, the dreaded Rear Admiral, tattling, ganging up on each other, you name it. But you grow out of it, hopefully none the worse for the wear, and with a healthy respect for your older sibling – who now that he is a COP, has a whole new arsenal of weapons to potentially use against me.

That being said, I am afraid that one day I will come home and my laptop will have been duct taped to a streetlight as I, ahem, may have done to my sister once upon a time.

(What?! I let her go eventually.)