Tuesday, January 13, 2009

I have a terrible secret...

I have a terrible, shameful secret to confess to y’all. This is so much worse than when I confessed to my addiction to Guitar Hero; much worse than my desire to have one of my future offspring be able to belch the entire alphabet in one go; and a little bit worse than my continuing to play late 90s boy band music.

I am so embarrassed to admit this, I don’t even know if I can. People will want to lock me up away because clearly, I have lost my mind. Ohhhhh am I going to be able to do this? Just do it, Melodye. Do it quickly like ripping off a band-aid. Here goes:

I really want the Richard Simmons: Sweating to the Oldies DVD set.

I know, I know! I’m sick! I’m INSANE, even. What sane person wants to see those candy-striped short shorts bouncing up and down? What NORMAL person voluntarily pays money to see a grown man in bedazzled tank tops yelling out: “Say farewell to fat!”

But the Time Life commercial for the DVD set looked so fun. I’m tired of my boring work-out – I want to have fun when I’m getting all sweaty. And I really LIKE oldies! “I’m So Excited” by the Pointer Sisters? Classic! Who wouldn’t want to sweat to that?!

And you know what? Richard Simmons really cares about those fat ladies behind him sweating to the oldies. That’s nice of him.

This is a really short post, but I’m kind of ashamed of myself. I think I’ll go put on Carmen Electra’s Strip-Aerobics, just so I can get my self-respect back.






Clearly, I DESERVE to be locked away, but I can’t help it.

5 comments:

goooooood girl said...

your blog is very fine......

Wade said...

People can say what they want about Richard Simmons, but he seems like one of the most genuine people out there. Sure, he's a little odd, but who isn't these days? The guy helps people and has a lot of fun doing it. More power to him and more power to you with your deep, dark secret. Haha.

Foxs said...

Haha!! I laughed when I heard they were selling this DVD, thinking, "Who is really going to buy this?" Melodye Gibson!!

p.s. I just noticed how you refered to me under "Blogs I dig". When do I get my first name back??

Kael said...

Lol, now that makes for an interesting mental image :p Seriously though, old Richie's not bad; at least he's not fake about what he does. Go for it. Maybe give the candy-striped leotards a miss, though....

Hilarye said...

I kinda want it too!